Stress

Kelihatannya bahagia

Oh tidak, itu hanya visualisasi saja

Mengapa begitu?

Coba kau perhatikan kembali

Masih terlihat bahagia

Memang bahagia, tapi

Tapi apa?

Lihatlah keretakan di tepinya

Ku telah memperhatikan

Benarkah?

Iya, keretakan menuju kerapuhan

Keretakan yang berasalah dari keegoisan

Apa yang kau rasakan sekarang?

Pedih, melihatnya

Sakit, merasakannya

Tak sanggup ku menahannya

Menangislah hingga kau terisak

Berteriaklah hingga kau serak

Tapi, untuk apa?

Keadaan tidak akan berubah

Remuk rasanya

tak sanggup lagi diri ini

Melihat, mendengar, merasa

Menoleh pun ku tak kuasa

Look around Kinabalu

After a week practicing two traditional dances from Indonesia that is Panji Semerang Dance from Bali  and Sinar Riau Dance from Riau; and a group working paper with the title 'Solutions of Ambalat's Dispute' finally, my friends and I flew over from Jakarta, Indonesia to Kinabalu, Sabah, Malaysia. Trust me, it is not a holiday thing to do, just a normal scientific visit to its top university, that is Universiti Malaya Sabah.

FIRST DAY

On this day, we planned to meet at two o'clock in Indonesia's International Airport that is Soekarno Hatta Airport. Since no one is going to drop me off there, so I used the public transportation from my house to this airport. We called it DAMRI here. It's a common use transportation, for people who doesn't want to go with their private transportation to go to this airport. Believe me, without traffic jam it took one and half hour to reach there. But every one who lives in Jakarta knew, traffic would always be the main problem. So probably, it took 2 hour more then to reach. 

My calculation was right. I got stuck with traffic jam in the middle of the trip. Yes, two hours it took for me to arrive to the airport. Luckily, there was only a few people that came before me. So, I wasn't that late. So we waited there, and the head of the delegation gave us our airplane tickets. Guess what, the plane was going to depart at half past five. So what did I do there? Wait and wait and wait. 

After we passed the immigration check, we finally came to the boarding session. Oh God, the plane is delayed until 8 or more. Another waiting session, God I was very hungry at that time. Unluckily, at that week, I didn't feel so well. As usual, gastric acid attack.

Next, finally time to depart. I sat in Seat 24 B, next to me, was the Chief of the International Relations Students Association, and the other side was one of my junior. However, the chief didn't want to sit on the window isle, so I exchanged seats with him. It was about 3 hours flight. I think, I'm not sure though. In the middle of the flight, one of the lecturer want to change seats with my junior. Because, my other junior next to the lecturer want to gossip around with her friend. So finally, they changed seats. 

Oh God, finally we arrived Kota Kinabalu at 11 pm there. One hour different time zone there. Of course, we were very hungry when we had reach there. The students and the lecturers of UMS greeted us warmly. But we put on that hungry face when we arrived, so you know how it goes. LOL. Luckily, the understood us. And took us to a local restaurant there. New taste of food. Our tongue felt strange, although it is next to Indonesia, but still the taste is very different. 

We reached our dormitory at one in the morning. Each and everyone of us, got different blocks, rooms, and places. So it was hard for us to contact each other. All of us felt awkward, because we had to wake up our new room mate at one in the morning. It was a very impolitely thing to do. 

In my room there was two of the UMS students and 2 from my campus. And luckily, the one that was in my room was one of the members of my working paper group. So we didn't directly went to sleep, instead we had to finish our paper work until five in the morning. Then we slept peacefully and feeling cold at the same time. 

To be continued....

That One Night

She always try to be the strongest person as she could be

She always try to be the most cherish person as she could be

However, 

That one night, suddenly tears came out from her eyes

she knew what she were crying for

the vacuum feeling that hurts the heart

She had this wish that has not been fulfilled yet

Day by day, she tried to convince and motivate herself

The right time will fulfilled her wish

That one night, she felt it

The feeling of incompleteness 

A wish that has not been fulfilled yet

She remains to be calm

She remains to think it will come

She remains to stay strong

She remains to stay happy

She remains to remind herself for not giving up

However,

that one night will always come

Creating tears in her eyes

Creating a mind that wishes to scream out loud

Creating wonders in her mind

She wants to know the feeling of her wish

She wants to feel it

Yet, her wishes will come at its right moment.

My 26th Sea Games Journey (Pt. 3)

THE RESULT

So, after three days, the result was out. I had to go back to GOR Soemantri Brojonegoro. Yes, at that time I'm still sick, in fact, I was even sicker than the day I had to do the test. Luckily, my friend was going there so I asked her a favor to look for my result. I waited for hours for the result, a mixture of feeling grew on me. It was a feeling between happy, scared, curious, angry, and weak all at one time. Cold sweat was coming out from my body. My head felt so heavy at that time. Finally, after couple of hours, a text message was sent to me saying that she couldn't see my name on the board because it wasn't placed in an alphabetical order. I was still anxious at that time, what result am I going to get. Did I failed? Or did I passed? 
After couple of minutes, another text message was sent to me saying I passed. Seeing that message, relieves all the feelings that came up in me. So I text-ed my friend  back, "How about you, did you pass?". Then she replied that she couldn't find her name but she will check it on the website. So I was wandering, there's a website? Why didn't I just opened the website then? So I ask my friend, what was the website? And she gave me the address. (www.psikoekselen.com)
So, I directly rebooted my laptop. Open one of my browsers, and browse the website above mentioned. The home page was browsed, then I clicked on one of its hyperlinks, the one that was written "Peserta VO Sea Games 2011" or the VO Sea Games 2011 Applicants. I clicked, it directed me to a page full of 868 names. I scrolled down the page and I still couldn't see my name listed in that page. So I scrolled up again, and checked back whether I missed my name in the list there. And yes I did, I missed out reading my name. There number 532 where my name is listed. Even if now at this moment I browsed back my name, I'm sure I would misread my name again. Because it is so full of names in that page. I really thank Allah for letting me passed this test. And of course, I wouldn't forget to browse my friend's name. Unluckily, my friend didn't pass the test, I feel so sad though. Because, she was the one who told me about this recruitment, but yet she was the one who didn't pass. After this information, all I had to do is wait until 1st August. At that date, the newest update will be put into the official sea games website. (www.seag2011.com). This is the website where we would see the next information about sea games 2011 recruitment. 
To be continued...