Attract

Ya Allah, Ya Muqolibal Qulub

I know that this is not the right place to talk about this. But I want to write it here, so that other people will also learn of how to deal this kind of problem. This is not my story, but yet this is the story where some people had faced it. In this story, I will use the pronoun "I", so that it will be easier to understand.

There's this one person, he doesn't belong to anyone else yet, and so do I. I don't know anything about this person yet. I haven't even talk that much with him. Something from him, attracts me toward him. I haven't notice it before, but suddenly that day. That day, I saw something that shines from him. But I really don't know what it is. Suddenly from that day, everything from him becomes beautiful. His smile, his silence, his attitude, his tone, and many more. 

However, I am sure. This is where I am wrong. Reminding from my past, this had happened before. Something from the person of the past, attracts me towards that person. But in the end, the story between that person and I ended in a way where my self-consciousness couldn't accept it. From that day on, I have been self solitary. 

But today is the present, yet it's a different character. He is not the same person of the past. He is a different person. However, I am still in that position where I am afraid to approach or even being approach by him.

So I try not to be too close to him. And let him think that I am just another stranger passing by. And also, I would also think of him as a stranger passing by. I just don't want that past story happens again. This kind of situation is better before it gets further. I don't really know him, and so does he. 

But something from him really attracts me. The more I see him, the more I hurt myself for no reason. But yet, I wouldn't let that kind of feeling forget my principle. He doesn't know me, and of course I don't either, we haven't even know each other for less than a year now. 

So let that stranger be stranger. If that feeling comes again, all I could do is pray. Ya Muqolibal Qulub. Please reverse this feeling, for if he is the best for me let him be close to me, but if he is not, let him be far away from me. For I don't want to feel another disappointment. 

 

Thought I'd Forgotten You

I thought I'd forgotten you,

I guess I was wrong.

I thought I'd forgotten you,

you suddenly appeared on my mind.

I thought I'd forgotten you,

you came into my presence. 

I thought you'd forgot me,

guess I was wrong.

I thought you'd stop thinking of me,

guess I was wrong.

I thought you'd stop bothering me,

guess I was wrong.

All you did was,

giving me harder times.

All you did was,

not letting me to forget you.

All you did was,

gaining my longing for you.

All you did was,

leaving me with my longing for you.

I'd thought that,

you are the meanest.

I'd thought that,

you are the cruelest.

You want me to want you.

But you don't want me to be with you. 

You came back, when I'd forgotten you.

Gave me another hopes, when I'd tried so hard not to.

Gave me more pains, than what I'd to deserve. 

And just a glimpse of an eye, you did all that.

A smile of your pride, to the mourn of my heart.