Faded Hope

Memories.. things that I would want to forget right now. I wish I really could. But it just won't happen. Those people gave me such big hopes about you and sadly I'm influenced by it. I used to never like you in the beginning, then those people came and gave me those hopes that made me fly in the sky. Then you started to show yourself, showing that those hopes that people had gave me were true. Why? I don't know. Was it just a bet? I don't know. 

From that moment, you made me fallen into you. I try to open up myself to you. I try to open my locked heart to you. Step by step, I really have fallen in love with you. But, the moment I had really open my heart for you, what did you do? Ignore me as if we didn't know each other. We're close, but then we became strangers. I thought I knew you, but you changed directly. Somehow as if you're trying to twist my heart around. 

Now, I regret that I had opened my heart again. I was so stupid to believe everything what I shouldn't believe. I was so stupid feeling the things I shouldn't feel. Now, I'm trying to stand strong in front of you. Trying to act that nothing has ever happen, yes it never did happen. Never did! Trying to ignore you but acting as if I'm not ignoring you. Because the more I see you, the more it hurts me. The more you smile at me, the more you're trying to kill me.  I will never know whether you did like, or whether you were just pretending. But now, I really don't want to find the answer. I don't want to wait for you anymore. Its time to move on. Its the time to find my future. For I have to stand strong. I'm tired of hoping. I'm tired of hearing impossible things. I'm tired when all of those people said to me I have to wait. Because I know, it's just too impossible. You're too mysterious for me. This moment you might gave me another hope, but then the next moment you will fade away again. You kept on doing this. I'm too tired. Now, I will try to fade all this hope. Trying to fade all my love for you although I knew I couldn't.

I hope the best for you only. I pray that someday you will get your happiness although you made me like this. Amin.